Feeling old today

I won’t be around on Saturday (7/28/07). I am going to attend my 30th High School reunion.

Now, if that doesn’t make you feel old….

 

It seems like just yesterday I was running around causing trouble, drinking too much (ok, that one hasn’t changed..lol), and feeling imortal.

Now, I get to go see how many of us are Gandma’s and Grandpa’s….lol

Luckily, I am not one yet but I don’t think it is too far away.

Anyway, I may be around Sunday, recuperating….

Poker wise, I haven’t played a lot.

I did play in the VIP Vegas League game on Sunday and won another ticket. I have three now. I guess I need to schedule a couple.

Last night, I met up with Dog on Skype. I only played one Monkey filled $2 SNG at Abs. I think I went out in 5th. Dog was playing a Omaha H/L freeroll at Poker Nordica when I left. He was doing pretty well, I don’t know what place he finished in.

They say aggression wins in Poker. I agree with that statement when playing “normal” people. But, as I was watching the Monkey’s, a thought came to me. How do you play aggressively against a Monkey?

I will have to give this some thought and maybe post about it next.

Good Luck to everyone this weekend. Hopefully, I will be able to see ya sometime this weekend.

Monkey Talk 101

   

For those of us who play Poker with the intent of playing the game correctly and attempt to learn more along the way, the following is a glossary of terms used by the Monkeys at the tables.

Hopefully, this will aid you in determining what is happening at the tables so you can clarify your next course of action.

Just so this post doesn’t get too long, I will break it up into sections. The first section will be about identification. The next will be about communication.

 

First, let’s define a Monkey.

mon·key

In Poker, a medium-sized primate found mostly in low buy in tournys and SNG’s. Monkeys include baboons, marmosets, capuchins, macaques, guenons, and tamarins, but exclude apes, lemurs, and tarsiers. These primates typically have a disregard for the game of Poker and play the game in an unusual way. The Monkey’s brain size does not allow room for starting hand requirements, pot odds calculations, or hand odds calculations so they are extremely dangerous at times when cornered. If you are not careful, a Monkey can take all your chips before you know what hit you because of their atypical play. Communication between Monkeys has developed into special terms which non-Monkeys in general, do not understand.

 

Now that we know what we are up against, we need to discuss the typical Monkey identifiers. Since we can’t actually see them, we need to use other “clues” to help us target and note the aforementioned primates.

Identification usually only takes the first few hands of any Poker tourney or SNG. Being Monkeys, they can’t help not identifying themselves quickly. So, here are a few typical examples of Monkeys being at your table.

 

1. All-in first hand pre-flop – This is the quickest identifier because it takes place in the first hand. If you run into this situation, the best thing to do is fold. There is a good reason for this. If the all-in Monkey is in early position, this play will also help identify OTHER Monkeys at your table. A true blue Monkey will not be able to lay down any hand in this situation so you may see other callers. The detriment to this situation however is that after the hand is over, one of the Monkeys will have a lot of chips. This shouldn’t last too long though because Monkeys have a hard time holding on to a lot of chips and they will be dispersed again soon.
2. The chasing Monkey – The chaser can be identified by watching them play a full hand. The chaser will call almost any bet all the way to the river, and then fold. The level of “Monkeyness” can be determined during this hand by the flop and opposing players betting. A high level Monkey will call bets 5 or 10 times the size of the blind all the way to the river. A high level Monkey will also call bets with a board where they only have 4 outs or less after the flop.
3. The chatter box Monkey – This Monkey normally identifies themselves by announcing to the table either before the tourney starts or right after it starts that they will crush everyone at the table and win.
4. The silent Monkey – These Monkeys tend to be a little elusive since they are very quiet. One of the best ways to identify them is to look at the hand history while playing if they were involved to see what type of cards they are playing. Calling raises in middle position with cards like a K 2 off or 6 10 suited are indicators of silent Monkey play.
5. The hidden Monkey – This is the most difficult one to identify. These Monkeys are at the top of the Monkey chain. They are hard to identify because they hide their Monkeyness at the beginning. It is only later in the tourney or SNG that the pull to be a Monkey becomes unbearable and they crack. These Monkeys can be quite dangerous because sometimes they have enough chips to pull Monkey type plays and can take you out. Caution should be used when running into this Monkey. One can only hope that the timing is correct and your opposition runs into this one first so they can be identified and dealt with.
6. Drunk Monkey – The combination of alcohol and Monkeyness can create the most dangerous primate out there. Great care should be taken when coming across this animal. Normally, the only thing that will kill or wound this Monkey is the “Nuts”. If you have identified this Monkey as being at your table, hopefully he is acting before you so you can fold anything except the Nuts because he/she is quite capable of playing any 2 cards and sucking out on a lot of hands. The best case scenario is other players who are not Monkeys have also identified him/her and there is an unspoken agreement between you to take him/her out. You will know this because other non-Monkeys will typically not aggressively play against each other until Drunk Monkey is taken out.

 

These are the ones I have learned about. If there are more, please help all of us by posting comments about the ones you have run into so we can all benefit.

 

It is time we try to take control of the tables back from the Monkeys so we can play in peace.

 

Next post, communications. How do they talk to each other?

     

  

Playing cards or playing poker?

I was thinking about all of the discussion lately regarding bad beats, RNG’s, “fixed” games, etc.

Something came to mind that I would like to throw out there for comments.

Perspective is very important when discussing these things.

I think there is a big difference between playing cards, and playing Poker. Most of you who are reading this are Poker players. When we play, we “expect” certain things to happen in different situations. For example, a 5 or 10 times raise of the big bling pre-flop is supposed to tell everyone playing at the table that you have a good hand. Anyone calling this bet should be very strong too. So, when someone calls in this situation you don’t expect to see them winning the hand with a Jack 9 off because from your Poker playing perspective, they should have never called.

However, from the “just playing cards” perspective, your opponent may have played because thats his favorite hand or, they looked good, or he/she had a “gut” feeling, etc.

To the card player, this was a justified call.

Maybe, because of bankroll situations, or the “risk level” of the games that are played, we have put ourselves in situations where we are applying our Poker expectations against a bunch of people playing cards.

Or, considering the growth of Poker and the ease of being able to play, there are a lot more uneducated people out there playing. Those are the people who watch TV Poker and think that thats really how the game is played.

Anyway, its just a thought.

I will be out of town for the next couple of days, I may be on line at night from the Hotel if I get the time. I played some with Larry (Lippy stopped in for a few min. too) the other night (lost all three I played) so I need to re-build my bankroll. I need a Skype crew fix so I may be trolling around.

See ya all later! Comments Welcome.

Well, I am back

I am back from a well deserved Holiday in Florida with my 2 sisters and most of the kids (2 were missing because of other commitments).

There was no Internet access the whole time we were there.

Of course, we did sneak in a little live poker one night. We played a couple of $5 buy in mini tourny’s. I got second in both and got my money back plus a little.

One of the guys playing was fairly good (too aggressive with crap cards) and my Nephew who is pretty good just didn’t get any cards.

As with most home games, there was a lot of Monkey play and you have to be careful not to get sucked out but all in all, it was fun.

I will work on posting some pics of the alligators, shrimp boil, rope swing, and other festivities when I get some time and maybe Paulies help. I have to go to Chicago for a couple of days on business. If I stay over down there. I will try to get on Skype.

I also have a Hot Water Heater incident I will discuss in more detail later.

I have been reading the blogs lately about sites, rewarding Monkey play, etc.

I’ll tell ya, I have a hard time believing a Poker site is going to reward stupid play just to keep games moving or because you just took money from their site.

I realize it is hard to accept and logically reason why people are winning hands when you go in with the best but maybe it has a lot to do with perspective.

I have not formulated all of my thoughts on this yet but one of the analogies I think of is like this.

Lets say you are interested in buying a new type of car. Prior to considering the type of car you want, you don’t remember seeing any in your area. Then, once you decide on the type of car you want, you realize there are a lot more cars in your area that you never noticed before. You don’t conscientiously think about it but you notice them more anyway.

Maybe this is type of thinking is part of what everyone is experiencing. Everyone is now focused either conscientiously  or sub conscientiously on the “bad beat” sceniario at a particular site.

How many times prior to the “bad beat” did you win when you should have? Maybe you have expereinced “bad beats” at other sites but haven’t noticed as much. 

This, of course, does not apply to not getting cards as in Lippy’s case. Not getting cards is just not getting cards.

I just have a hard time believing that out of the  thousands of players that play there, they picked out Lippy, decided he needed to loose, and adjusted the RNG just so HE didn’t get cards AND can’t win like the others once in a while with a 1 or 2 outer.

See what I mean?

As far as messing with the RNG, I go back to the age old question of Why? Why would a site risk everything to take a few $2, $5, SNG’s from someone that “should have” won and give it to someone who shouldn’t have won? Either way, they are paying out. What would be the benefit?

It is a very interesting topic.

Right now, I have to go and get ready for my trip.

Give me your thoughts and comments.

Thanks,